What's Your Horoscope? (Fil-Am Themed)

By Julia Termulo, FINDink Contributor

AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)

You are generally shy and reserved. You confine yourself to your tiny bedroom while your parents are singing karaoke downstairs with your Titas and Titos.

PISCES (February 19 - March 20)

You are blunt to a fault. However, you love with your whole heart - so when your Lola gives you a hand-sewn pajama set, you give her a big hug, a kiss on the cheek, and a resounding “Salamat po!”

ARIES (March 21 - April 19)  

You are courageous, if not somewhat aggressive. You’ll never hesitate to take that last piece of lumpia.

TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)

You’re a slave to the material world. You’ll spend an entire high school’s worth of allowance on a single Supreme hoodie. Your tinder bio reads: “looking for a hype-bae”

GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)

You’re two-faced. You feel threatened by other Filipino girls, but you’ll still compliment their outfits even though you know damn well that hot pink and royal blue is not a cute combination. Your hair is dyed ombre.

CANCER (June 21 - July 22)

You are tenacious. When you put your mind to something, you don’t give up. So when your mom incessantly begs for you to pursue a career in the medical field, you’ll write a five-paragraph essay defending your decision to study liberal arts.

LEO (July 23 - August 22)

You are dramatic. You cry while watching any rom-com starring Daniel Padilla. He’s really not a good actor, nor is he even that cute.

VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)

You are shy. When people assume you’re hispanic because of your last name, you don’t correct them. When Tita Bing asks, “do you hab boypren?” at the Pacquiao viewing party, you shake your head and start blushing.

LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)

You are fair-minded and diplomatic. You decided to study pre-med out of your own volition. As a result, your mom puts more pinipig polvoron in your care package than your little sister’s.

SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)

You are unapologetic. You’re not afraid to be who you are. You’ll prop up one knee while sitting, no matter how formal the occasion.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 2)

You are prone to break promises. You’ll say you’ll be there at 8 o’clock, but you’ll actually arrive at midnight with soggy lumpia in a foil container.

CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)

You are resourceful. You’ve found a way to solve every problem or predicament in your life with a tub of Vicks Vapor Rub.

 

Disclaimer: The views of the author do not necessarily represent the views of FIND, Inc.